love from the tombs

Pacing back and forth in the middle of my bedroom, eyes cast toward a presumed heaven and hands clasped together in dire supplication, I desperately cried to god for deliverance. Anxiety overwhelmed me and earnestly I prayed that Monday should never come. The following day I was scheduled to perform a magic trick in front of my second grade class and I was nervous beyond compare. I didn't know a single trick yet I was deemed to make a penny disappear right before my friends eyes. What could I do? I was hopelessly lost and the thought of learning sleight of hand never occurred to me, so I turned to the only source imaginable - an all-knowing and powerful god. Surely he would make everything right. It was the first time I can recall asking god for help. However nothing miraculous happened. Though I bluffed my prowess in childish bravado, everyone saw my fraudulent attempt at a not-so-sly cache down my sleeve. I did survive the stress and the later embarrassment, but never again did I undertake impossible feats of illusion and the hope of divine intervention was sorely disappointed.

When things seem too much to bear, we often plead, cajole, and bargain with god for salvation. My dear aunt suffers from Alzheimer's and each week I beseech an almighty spirit for her recovery. My sister struggles with financial woes so I call upon a higher power for help. My best friend's nephew is locked up in prison and I appeal to grace for release. So many trials and tribulations we entreat god for and yet hear no answer. The frightening devastation in Japan, the amplifying crises in the Middle East and Africa, and the extreme political discord in our own country strike confusion in our hearts begging the question: Does god listen to prayer? Perhaps even; Does god exist at all?

This is what Mary and Martha of Bethany presume in this morning's gospel when faced with their brother's illness and death. They summon and implore Jesus as friend, healer, miracle worker, and savior to come to their rescue. Only he, or god working through him, can do it. But he doesn't - at least not at first - and not in the way we think. Lazarus dies and the Christ remains aloof. Both sisters rebuke him saying, "If you had been here, my brother would not have died." I, too, would have been angry. Here was our last and best hope and he let us down. Perhaps we've been deceived. If this god can not do what we think he can, maybe he's not the real Messiah.

And then comes the climax. No, not that the cadaver rises from the tomb, but that Jesus, upon seeing the heartfelt emotion of the mourners sitting shivah, weeps. The shortest sentence in the New Testament is perhaps the most powerful. Jesus weeps as he recognizes that this is where god exists; Not in the power of miracles but in the sorrow, as well as the joy, of the living. Rabbi Harold Kushner's classic tome "When bad things happen to good people" elegantly expresses this theme. God is not all powerful, he says, but all compassionate. Bad things happen for many reasons - being in the wrong place at the wrong time; Natural calamities occur over which god has no command; We are free to choose our own path and regretfully we often choose evil; and occasionally we bring tragedy upon ourselves and/or others. What he suggests is that there is no "answer" or explanation to suffering, but there is a response. It's how we deal with affliction is what calls out of Golgotha

The pain, anguish, and unfairness of life shall always be with us, but we are called to recognize that we - and we alone -  are the agents of healing. Impossible feats of divine intervention is simply childish, wishful thinking. We bring god to life by revealing the divine nature. As the harbingers of love, life is brought forth as god calls us out of our tombs of apathy. As such, love never ceases to arise. Lou Blanchard, Canon Missioner at Diocese of Colorado today preached, "God weeps with us in every pain we bear, and through this love he calls us to life." As the image of god that we are, we are called to mourn with those who suffer; Delight with those who are joyful; and bring mercy and justice to those who are needy, Come out and live. Be unbound. Be love.

love, always,
pia